THE PRESIDENT: Vice President Biden, Mr. Chief Justice, members of the United States Congress, distinguished guests, Mr. Sorros, my friends from Solyndra, and members of the Hollywood establishment, and fellow citizens:
Each time we gather to inaugurate a President we bear witness to the enduring strength of our Constitution. God knows it has withstood quite the onslaught during my first administration. We affirm the promise of our democracy. Especially for those well-connected union thugs and progressive interest groups that can pay me for access. We recall that what binds this nation together is not the colors of our skin or the tenets of our faith or the origins of our names. What makes us exceptional -- what makes us American -- is our allegiance to an idea articulated in a declaration made more than two centuries ago: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights; that among these are life, (unless you are unborn –then your life is a choice of the woman) liberty (as long as you define it as the government providing you stuff and not by actual constitutional and natural rights), and the pursuit of happiness.” (as long as that happiness is determined to be progressively acceptable and politically correct.)
Today we continue a never-ending journey to bridge the meaning of those words with the realities of our time. For history tells us that while these truths may be self-evident, they’ve never been self-executing; that while freedom is a gift from God as he is defined by liberation theology as described by Reverend Wright it must be secured by His people here on Earth, which of course excludes the neocons and those others whom are influenced by Zionist pigs. (Applause.) The patriots of 1776 did not fight to replace the tyranny of a king with the privileges of a few or the rule of a mob. The Occupy Wall Street and SEIU mobs notwithstanding. They gave to us a republic, a government of, and by, and for the people, entrusting each generation to keep safe our founding creed; a creed that while charming and quaint, I found needing to be replaced so that we could fundamentally transform America into a fairer nation.
Through blood drawn by lash and blood drawn by sword, we learned that no union founded on the principles of liberty and equality could survive half-slave and half-free. We made ourselves anew, and vowed to move forward together, as we all are now enslaved to a benign and beneficent federal government that seeks only that all people are not only created equal but have equal outcomes in life. Individualism is to be forsaken for the common good. Equality will be achieved under
Together, we determined that a modern economy requires railroads (especially high speed railroads subsidized by you idle rich, even though it will take a long while to ramp up ridership) and highways to speed travel and commerce, schools and colleges to train our workers.
Together, we discovered that a free market only thrives when there are rules to ensure competition and fair play, even though we chose who would be winners and losers in the free market place. (You are welcome GM, Chrysler, and my sincere apologies to those of you in coal production.)
Together, we resolved that a great nation must care for the vulnerable, and protect its people from life’s worst hazards and misfortune. And yes, I am still working on getting disaster aid for those of you affected by Hurricane Sandy. Sorry, but I have been a little busy with
Through it all, we have never relinquished our skepticism of central authority, (Are you serious? Who put that line in there?) nor have we succumbed to the fiction that all society’s ills can be cured through government alone. (Okay, now nobody is going to think I really believe this crap) Our celebration of initiative and enterprise, our insistence on hard work and personal responsibility, these are constants in our character. (Did someone cut and paste this from a Romney speech? Please delete from final draft.)
But we have always understood that when times change, so must we; that fidelity to our founding principles requires new responses to new challenges; that preserving our individual freedoms ultimately requires collective action, such as placing common sense gun control restrictions on our second amendment rights for the common good of all citizens, either by legislation, or if necessary by executive fiat. For the American people can no more meet the demands of today’s world by acting alone than American soldiers could have met the forces of fascism or communism with muskets and militias. No single person can train all the math and science teachers we’ll need to equip our children for the future, or build the roads and networks and research labs that will bring new jobs and businesses to our shores. You all didn’t build that; Government did! Now, more than ever, we must do these things together, as one nation and one people, as one all-knowing and all-providing federal government. (Applause.)
This generation of Americans has been tested by crises that steeled our resolve and proved our resilience. I suspect my administration will prove to be perhaps the greatest challenge yet to overcome for this and forthcoming generations. A decade of war is now ending. (Applause.) An economic recovery has begun, despite all economic indicators to the contrary. Paul Krugman has even said so! (Applause.) America’s possibilities are limitless, for we possess all the qualities that this world without boundaries demands (Not that I ever intended to enforce our national boundaries from the beginning): youth and drive; diversity and openness; an endless capacity for risk and a gift for reinvention. My fellow Americans, we are made for this moment, and we will seize it -- so long as we seize it together. Indeed we must seize it together as a common people because the rugged individualism that helped create this country has become a cancer to it and it must be eradicated. (Applause.)
For we, the people, understand that our country cannot succeed when a shrinking few do very well and a growing many barely make it. (Never mind the fact that it is the intrusiveness and meddlesomeness of government that has brought this condition about. Class warfare is necessary so that we can have the equal sharing of misery prosperity for all.) (Applause.) We believe that America’s prosperity must rest upon the broad shoulders of a rising middle class. We know that America thrives when every person can find independence and pride in their work; (Go UAW!) when the wages of honest labor (is this a contradictory and oxymoronic term as it applies to unions?) liberate families from the brink of hardship. We are true to our creed when a little girl born into the bleakest poverty knows that she has the same chance to succeed as anybody else, because she is an American; she is free, and she is equal, not just in the eyes of God but also in our own. (Applause.)
We understand that outworn programs are inadequate to the needs of our time. That is why we must reinvigorate them and provide them with even greater funding. So we must harness new ideas and technology to remake our government, like streamlining the bureaucracy so that a vast majority of power rests in the executive branch, revamp our tax code so that the evil and selfish rich will finally pay their fair share of 95%, reform our schools so that only politically correct and progressive indoctrination is taught, and empower our citizens with the skills they need to work harder, learn more, reach higher. But while the means will change, our purpose endures: a nation that rewards the effort and determination of every single American. That is what this moment requires. That is what will give real meaning to our creed.
We, the people, still believe that every citizen deserves a basic measure of security and dignity. That is why I have seen to it that we have subsidized your buying of a new car with cash for clunkers, have removed penalties from your mortgages that you never could have afforded in the first place, and even allowed you the means to buy a tax-payer funded Obama-phone! We must make the hard choices to reduce the cost of health care, even though my signature legislation of Obamacare has created ever greater costs, and the size of our deficit, even though everybody knows I have no intention whatsoever of worrying about the deficit as displayed in my last few budgets that I couldn’t even get a single Democrat to support. But we reject the belief that America must choose between caring for the generation that built this country and investing in the generation that will build its future. (Applause.) For we remember the lessons of our past, when twilight years were spent in poverty and parents of a child with a disability had nowhere to turn. We refuse to starve the patient back to health. We will continue spending accordingly!
We do not believe that in this country freedom is reserved for the lucky, or happiness for the few. No! Freedom and happiness is reserved only for those that contribute to my campaign and causes. We recognize that no matter how irresponsibly we live our lives, any one of us at any time may face a job loss, or a sudden illness, or a home swept away in a terrible storm. The commitments we make to each other through Medicare and Medicaid and Social Security, these things do not sap our initiative, they strengthen us, even as I cut billions from Medicare to fund Obamacare. (Applause.) They do not make us a nation of takers; the fact that we take what we could and should provide for ourselves; THAT is what makes us a nation of takers. they free us to take the risks that make this country great. (Yeah, whatever…: This speech needs to be shortened, I have a 2:15 tee time at Andrews GC.) (Applause.)
We, the people, still believe that our obligations as Americans are not just to ourselves, but to all posterity. We will respond to the threat of climate change, knowing that the failure to do so would betray our children and future generations. (Applause.) Some may still deny the overwhelming judgment of
The path towards sustainable energy sources will be long and sometimes difficult. But America cannot resist this transition, we must lead it. We must continue to subsidize the Solyndra’s of the world, despite their repeated and costly failures with billions of tax payer dollars. We cannot cede to other nations the technology that will power new jobs and new industries, we must claim its promise. Never mind that I am subsidizing Brazil’s and other nations’ drilling for oil with U.S. dollars. (Reminder: ask George Soros how his Petrobas stock is doing.) That’s how we will maintain our economic vitality and our national treasure -- our forests and waterways, our crop lands and snow-capped peaks. That is how we will preserve our planet, commanded to our care by God. (All of these references to God are really starting to annoy me. The state is god. In other words, I AM the messiah.) That’s what will lend meaning to the creed our fathers once declared. (Not to be confused with the creed of anti-colonialism and Marxism of which my father dreamed and Bill Ayers ghost-wrote for me.)
We, the people, still believe that enduring security and lasting peace do not require perpetual war. (Yawn.) (Applause.) Our brave men and women in uniform, tempered by the flames of battle, are unmatched in skill and courage. (Applause.) Our citizens, seared by the memory of those we have lost, know too well the price that is paid for liberty. The knowledge of their sacrifice will keep us forever vigilant against those who would do us harm, such as the right-wing extremist groups, the Tea Party, and NRA members. But we are also heirs to those who won the peace and not just the war; who turned sworn enemies into the surest of friends, (hell, Vladimir Putin and I see eye to eye on nearly everything, especially now that I have won reelection and can be more flexible with him.) -- and we must carry those lessons into this time as well.
We will defend our people and uphold our values through strength of arms and rule of law. Just ask Mommar Quadafi; oh wait, I violated law by not getting congressional approval there. Never mind! We will show the courage to try and resolve our differences with other nations peacefully –- Just ask Ahmadinejad as Iran puts the finishing touches on their nuclear weapons program! not because we are naïve about the dangers we face, but because engagement can more durably lift suspicion and fear. (Applause.)
America will remain the anchor of strong alliances in every corner of the globe, as we continue to lead from behind. And we will renew those institutions that extend our capacity to manage crisis abroad, for no one has a greater stake in a peaceful world than its most powerful nation of China. We will support socialist democracy from Asia to Africa, from the Americas to the Middle East, because our interests and our conscience compel us to act on behalf of those who long for freedom, and our need to establish a global tax on the wealthiest of the world. And we must be a source of hope to the poor, the sick, the marginalized, the victims of prejudice –- not out of mere charity, but because peace in our time requires the constant advance of those principles that our common creed describes: tolerance and opportunity, human dignity and justice. (I like this line’s combining of Neville Chamberlain and Karl Marx. Good job!)
We, the people, declare today that the most evident of truths –- that all of us are created equal (although some of us are more equal than others) –- is the star that guides us still; just as it guided our forebears through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall; just as it guided all those men and women, sung and unsung, who left footprints along this great Mall, to hear a preacher say that we cannot walk alone; to hear a King proclaim that our individual freedom is inextricably bound to the freedom of every soul on Earth. (Applause.)
It is now our generation’s task to carry on what those pioneers began. For our journey is not complete until our wives, our mothers and daughters can earn a living equal to their efforts, and their choice to not be punished with the mistake of having to have a baby is enshrined in stone. (Applause.) Our journey is not complete until our gay brothers and sisters are treated like anyone else under the law, and even though I changed my mind of this subject less than a year ago, I have come to see that the antiquated and bigoted stance of morality as defined by archaic Judeo-Christian faiths must be made illegal –- (applause) -- for if we are truly created equal, then surely the love we commit to one another must be equal as well. (Applause.) Our journey is not complete until no citizen is forced to wait for hours to exercise the right to vote, even if they are undocumented workers.(Assuming they vote Democrat, that is!) (Applause.) Our journey is not complete until we find a better way to welcome the striving, hopeful immigrants who still see America as a land of opportunity -- (applause) -- until bright young students and engineers are enlisted in our workforce rather than expelled from our country. God knows we need to continue to provide visas to engineers and those with hard science backgrounds because our college aged youth, and not incidentally supporters of mine, are too damned lazy and want liberal arts degrees in Art History or Women’s Studies. (Applause.) Our journey is not complete until all our children, from the streets of Detroit to the hills of Appalachia, to the quiet lanes of Newtown, know that they are cared for and cherished and always safe from harm, once we finally and fully repeal that asinine second amendment.
That is our generation’s task -- to make these words, these rights, these values of life and liberty and the pursuit of happiness real for every American, even if the government has to fund whatever that might mean for each person. Being true to our founding documents does not require us to agree on every contour of life. Hell, I don’t agree with most of our Constitution to this day since it is a list of “negative liberties” for the government. It does not mean we all define liberty in exactly the same way or follow the same precise path to happiness. Progress does not compel us to settle centuries-long debates about the role of government for all time, I will make that final determination!
For now decisions are upon us and we cannot afford delay, like Harry Reid has done by not putting forth a budget for nearly four years now. We cannot mistake absolutism for principle, or substitute spectacle for politics, or treat name-calling as reasoned debate, at least when these tactics are employed by the Republicans anyway. (Applause.) We must act, knowing that our work will be imperfect. We must act, knowing that today’s victories will be only partial and that it will be up to those who stand here in four years and 40 years and 400 years hence to advance the timeless spirit once conferred to us in a spare Philadelphia hall. (Not that I think for even a moment that this nation and its economy will survive to 2016, at least not if I have anything to do about it!)
My fellow Americans and other equally important citizens of the world, the oath I have sworn before you today and will likely break before day’s end, like the one recited by others who serve in this Capitol, was an oath to God and country, not party or faction. And we must faithfully execute that pledge during the duration of our service. But the words I spoke today are not so different from the oath that is taken each time a soldier signs up for duty or an immigrant realizes her dream. My oath is not so different from the pledge we all make to the flag that waves above and that fills our hearts with pride. The difference is a lot of those other people actually mean and intend to try and abide by that sacred oath.
They are the words of citizens and they represent our greatest hope. You and I, as citizens, have the power to set this country’s course. You and I, as citizens, have the obligation to shape the debates of our time -- not only with the votes we cast, the votes we find, and the votes we create, but with the voices we lift in defense of our most ancient values and enduring ideals. (Applause.)
Let us, each of us, now embrace with solemn duty and awesome joy what is our lasting birthright. With common effort and common purpose for the common good, with passion and dedication, let us answer the call of history and carry into an uncertain future that precious light of